One of the most terrifying things about rejection is that is is something you just can't avoid, no matter what you are doing there will always be a chance that rejection could occur. Since leaving my sixth form and becoming a much more regular blogger while also beginning to reach out for photography work at gigs there have been many cases of rejection. There's something about it that still terrifies me, I could have ten emails accepting me for work or offering something I have been working for years to achieve and yet one email containing a form or rejection will completely flip my mood.
I have often found myself sat dwelling upon this idea that I wasn't good enough for the band or brand, wondering what was wrong with my work and why they just didn't want to work with me. Most of the time this isn't a personal thing, it is important to remember that so many people are reaching out for opportunities everyday meaning that they just can't work with everyone. They have to look at who will work best for them and that is okay, because at the end of the day we are doing the same while applying for these kinds of opportunities.
Not only am I somehow terrified of receiving rejection to the point that I will sit staring at an email in my inbox for what feels like hours before I finally open it (someone please tell me I'm not the only one who does this). I am also scared of giving the rejection, working as a blogger means that you get quite a few brands reaching out to you for things that just don't really fit your niche or what you stand for. The funniest example of this is a friend of mine got contacted by Barclays to create a serious sit down video series on banking when his videos didn't fit that criteria at all, and so he turned the offer down.
I think to begin with I was so excited about the idea of brands wanting to work with me that I didn't want to seem rude by not working with them, but in the end this did more harm than good. If I wanted to begin to create a niche for myself then saying no every now and then was something that was so important to my growth. Over the past few months I have managed to create a little draft that I will tend to edit where needed and send off as a form of rejection, I always keep it friendly though because while they took their time to contact you it is important to show you appreciate that.
While I am slowly learning to accept the work world rejection and how to give and receive it along with the simple fact that not every person is going to like me rejection in my personal life will always be the most terrifying thing. For the longest time I would bite my tongue and hold back things I wanted to say to people to avoid any chances of being rejected. As a pre-teen I would sit terrified to message the boy I liked in fear that he would tell his mates and I could be the laughing stock of the school the next day (and I went to an all-girls school so it's not like I would have even known the boys school were laughing at me anyway).
This ended up getting ridiculous in the end, I would be put into situations I didn't want to be in because I didn't want to speak out and say what I thought in fear that everyone would see me differently and not want to know me. Of course, I have found my voice these days and know when I need to speak out about my feelings and what I believe in to avoid getting into these kinds of situations but I still have this fear in the back of my mind that people won't like me for speaking out.
Can we talk about how ridiculous this fear is??? Why would I even want to associate myself with those people that don't accept me for what I stand for in the first place??? If they don't understand where I am coming from then what point is it to have them in my life???
For the past few months I have been learning to understand that in this life not everyone is going to accept you, not everyone is going to want to be in your life, and you aren't going to want to be in everyone's life either. Sometimes rejection is one of the most vital things for your growth and development as a person, it can push you a few steps further into the direction of achieving your goals or even make you realise ones you didn't even think you had in the first place.
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